23 body language tricks for what be friendly instantly
You send signals to people all day, without paying attention. The way you move your eyes, the way you wave a hand and so on. There are things you can do to send subconscious signals using body language that make people like you better or at least gives you the benefit of the doubt. Whenever I discuss techniques like these, there are always one or two people who feel uncomfortable with "influencing" someone with psychological tricks.
The manipulation is not negative.
Influence is changing someone's behavior or mind
Manipulation is intentionally influencing
When you hear the word manipulation, you can immediately think of negative things. Please do not do it
The manipulation is not bad. People with bad intentions are bad.
Example 1: a Manipulative manipulative person
Bad people are bad The bad people who manipulate are problematic. An example of this:
Mean Girl wants to reduce the social position of Sweet Classmate
She tells the other classmate that this person did something horrible.
The class likes Sweet Classmate less.
Sweet classmate feels sad now
Example 2: friendly handling
Manipulation can make everyone in a better situation.
Party Person is an experienced manipulator.
Party person meets another person
The person at the party smiles in a nice way and apologizes, even if the other person was wrong
Party Person does not get into a fight and has a great night
The problem with the example of Mean Girl is not manipulation, the problem is bad intentions and lies.
My request: to have good intentions.
I guess you'll use these tricks with good intentions. Please do it.
Section 1: Attitude and body language.
Positive attitude
The human mind is critical, it is what it does. It is what kept us alive during evolution. We make judgments in divided seconds:
Is this person a threat?
Is this person attractive?
Is this person useful for my (social) survival?
Pay attention to this instinct, but never act on it without knowing the person better. The tricks below will make you behave in a way that is perceived well.
This section does not deal strictly with body language, but these attitudes will unconsciously influence your body language.
Feel safe and project confidence.
This is so important that it requires your own article, and you can never do this 100% of the time. In addition, there are certainly cases in which not appearing confident can earn points of sympathy, but on average, the above is true.
There are two things to consider this point:
Try to eliminate things that bother you.
For me, the bad skin was a problem, which I solved like that.
Another was the choice of clothes, which I resolved by taking a girl to buy.
Train yourself to help you feel safe
I learned a lot from the self-help audiobooks that I downloaded.
For me, staying in shape helped me a lot. Read the 4-Hour Body or its summary.
Everyone is a friend unless proven otherwise.
Why burn bridges before you have made them in the first place? Has no sense:
You have everything to gain
You've got nothing to lose
You will soon notice if this person wishes to be a good friend.
Everyone deserves respect unless proven otherwise.
Again, you have everything to gain and nothing to lose by treating people with respect. That does not mean you should kiss the boots all day; This means that you should not fire anyone or make them feel unimportant.
Like everyone, until they do not deserve it.
Strangers deserve to have the benefit of the doubt. In our world, anyone can be anything, without looking like that. I have met douchebags who seemed kind and multimillionaires who behaved like excited children. Look at the cover of the book, but read some pages before judging.
Neither the asshole nor the Billionaire is "better" than the other. But being close to one made me feel unhappy, and the other made me feel enthusiastic and enthusiastic.
Always think about what you can do for others.
When you meet someone, do not think 'what can you do for me?' but rather 'what can I do for them?' Helping people is the best way to make them want to help you, and everyone wins.
Keep in mind that I am not saying that I should give unsolicited advice to look smart. Help people if they really believe that this person's life would be better with the knowledge/ help/contact they can offer.
Offer help, but do not push. Be brief and let them decide.
Section 2: Posture
Example of posture
Your body is constantly pointing to the people you know. The position influences the quick second judgment that people make about you, but also in what you think about yourself. Also, the correct posture is good for your back, what do you not like?
Stand up straight, but relaxed
To find a positive position, try the following:
Stand with your feet as wide as your hips.
Make yourself as high possible, imagine that you get up by the top of your head
Now keep that feeling of being tall, but relax your shoulders.
Relax your neck and tilt your head so you do not have to look up or down to look into the eyes of the average person.
Some advice:
Relax as much as possible while maintaining your posture.
Do not inflate chest, it must be flat as if it were lying on a floor
Pull your shoulders back very slightly
Sit straight, but not rigid
When you begin to sit up straight, you will notice how small people are. You'll instantly feel pretty high when you're sitting at a table. Keep your back straight, but relax as much as possible.
Always have a little tension in your core.
Your abs, back, and general core should never be flaccid/loose when standing or sitting. Keep your abdomen and core in general under some tension. Not only is it reflected well in your posture, but it also facilitates movement with grace.
Position your feet at an approximate distance from the hip
The posture of your feet says a lot about you. It is not an exact science, but putting your feet together usually means insecurity, while a wider posture indicates confidence.
Both the fact that you keep your feet too close and those that are too far apart can reflect you badly.Try aiming for a position where your feet are the hip width or slightly wider, but not much.
Section 3: Enter a room
The moment you enter a room is the moment you expose yourself to the judgment of the people in that room. Make sure you use that.
Some would recommend more extreme techniques like the peacock, but that does not apply to all situations.
Smile as if you were happy to be there
Regardless of whether you are or not, smile when you enter a room. Smile as if you really like what you're seeing. Do not overdo it, do not laugh out loud. Smile as if you came out and you noticed that the sun was shining.
Greet the crowd
Not explicitly Do not shout "HEY!" Do not attract explicit attention unless they are people who appreciate such behavior. Otherwise, take just a moment to sit still or walk slowly while looking at the people in the room.
Make eye contact
Do not look at the crowd as if it were an object. Look people in the eyes and if someone looks at you with a smile, they smile. Making people feel like a positive influence has just entered this room.
Take your time
This shows confidence, but it also means an open attitude.
Wave to friends (imaginary)
Humans are programmed to please and/or respect people with friends. When you walk into a room and follow your usual routine "greet the crowd" make a Follow up by greeting your friends and saying something like "I'll be there."
Here's the thing, feel free to do this to imaginary friends. I do this all the time in bigger events. Keep in mind that people do not see 360 degrees. If you greet a Person who does not exist behind them, they do not know that you are only greeting the empty air.
This has a series of effects:
People assume you know people
You have more time to quietly look around you.
You will feel more confident
The trick here is to do this with complete confidence, not to shake timidly. Say hello as if your best friend is on the other side of the room and you try to communicate that soon you will be there.
Section 4: The handshake
Use a firm but gentle handshake
Men, especially, are sensitive to the way you shake their hand. A weak handshake or 'dead fish' will instantly lose your points of sympathy.
Do not just "offer" your hand, a handshake is a teamwork.
Use the pressure you would use to grab the stick of a heavy pan
Yes a person offers a 'dead fish' handshake, do not tighten it too much
Make eye contact while shaking hands.
Looking the other way automatically means negative things:
You do not have attention/respect for the other person.
You have something to hide
Look into someone's eyes long enough to memorize the color of their eyes. Do not stare, just watch for a moment.
Smile as if they made you the day
When looking into someone's eyes during the shake, smile as if you saw something in their eyes that makes you happy.
Do not laugh out loud, just smile.
Section 5: Positioning
How and where it is positioned makes a difference in how it is perceived. The positioning combined with the posture is very powerful.
Open your posture
When speaking with someone, place your body in such a way that it is open to them. Preferably positioned in a 'vulnerable' manner. Do not cover your chest with your arms, do not bend, etc. This means trust and comfort.
Lean toward the person you are talking to.
It's a subtle change, but making sure your body is "pointing" at your conversation partner makes a difference. Removal can mean fear, insecurity, and distrust.
Do not lean on objects
Leaning on/against an object (for example, a wall) means passivity and possibly insecurity. Whenever you can get up with a good posture. Try to develop a comfortable 'neutral posture' using the tips of the posture section.
When you lean, use the posture
If you have to rely on something for some reason, maintain good posture. Do not be left behind.
Section 6: Your face
Your face is an area with a lot of signage. In fact, there is a lot of research on the micro expressions that people do unconsciously. People project a lot of information without knowing it. You can use your face to send information about yourself to people.
Make your neutral face a happy face
Have you heard of 'Resting Bitch Face Syndrome'? Some people claim that their face at rest seems annoyed/angry, which makes people perceive them as a social danger. Preferably you would not talk to a person with that kind of expression on his face.
However, it does not say anything about the real person. But it disadvantages them.
Make sure that your face at rest (for example, when you are working on a laptop) looks relaxed if you are not happy. An easy trick is to have a look on your face since something is fun for you.
Do not break eye contact instantly.
People have a habit of looking the other way if they meet the eyes of a person. Try not to do this. Keep eye contact, and smile. Often people look the other way, although some people will hold your gaze.
Doing this has multiple effects:
People perceive you as more open.
You will feel more confident
Keep in mind that when you hold someone's gaze, be sure to smile. Looking impassively can be very scary.
How to smile
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There is a very simple trick to smile: imagine that you are seeing something that you really like.
Smiling is not about moving your face in a certain way, it's about feeling a happy feeling and letting your face express it.
Section 7: Techniques and habits.
Here I cover some things you can do that often involve some measure of interaction with your conversation/communication data.
Reflect your posture
A powerful technique that has been researched a lot is the reflex. This means that people feel more comfortable around you and they want you better if you keep the same way they do. For example:
Have you crossed your arms? Cross the arms
Are you leaning on your right leg? Lean on your right leg
Are you having a drink? Have a drink
The key here is not to be obvious. The moment you consciously notice what you are doing, the technique loses power.
Mirror movements
As with the previous point, you should not be obvious. But small things can go a long way:
Are you having a coffee, pick up your cup to drink? Do the same
If they smile, they smile back (that's easy)
Are you getting a little closer to you? Do the same
Again, do not be obvious and do not be a wretch. This technique should be used discreetly, but frequently.
